Early Retirement

Today I officially join the 8.8 million (and growing) other people in this great country that don't have a job. I must admit it feels pretty good. I thought to bring closure to my last gig it would be good to share some of the life lessons learned in the trenches.

First lesson: A corporation is built to make money for shareholders. The less they can pay you as an employee the better job they are doing of meeting shareholder expectations. Plain and simple.

Second lesson: You're 'five year career' plan that you spent so much time in creating is only important to you (that is unless you've left a copy of it in the men's' room and the toilet paper dispenser has run out. It may (and even then it's unlikely) garner some attention from 'senior management'.)

Third lesson: No good deed goes unpunished. I think this may be a biblical reference, but I bet those of you in your cubes reading this can come up with two dozen applications for the 'real world'.

Fourth lesson: No matter what job you have there is a 50% chance that you are working too hard. Others in the group are not working at all, but have (and this is no small feat) cut 3 strokes off their handicap since their last employer.

Fifth lesson: Age matters. Mid 20's, smart, respected, voracious reader, natural ability to get people to follow, curious about the world, personable, and creative; go to grad school. Try it again in 5 years.

While I'd like to continue I must admit that my morning yoga class took a bit more out of me than I had anticipated. I think it's best if I grab a short nap before meeting buddies for early afternoon cocktails. So long 9-5!